Day 89 | bigeyesseemore's Blog

Yesterday...was..fucking..great.
Just love my life.
She was coming towards me, never seen that sort of rage in her eyes.
So I left.
She told me not to come back, wasn't planning on it either.
As I was walking I kept thinking,
I should be studying for my math test.
That brought tears to my eyes,
Knowing that I'm walking away from my house,
Not studying like normal people do.
Hurts.
Bad.

So I talked to Millon for the couple hours I was at the lake, had a place to stay eventually.

It was so cold.

But at around 9 she said she wanted me back, said she wasn't done.

He was there..
Asked if I hated myself.
For the first time,
I said no.

He told me I'd regret that,
I was cornered as he threw the mirror.
My reflection cutting into me,

Shoulda never come back.

Scratches all down my body,


Shoulda never come back.


He told me I should get better at killing myself, spit on me and they both left the house.


I am so done..so sick of it. 

Who am I kidding?

I'm only joking with myself when I say 
Its great I didn't cut last night.
Great I didn't give up.

But I will.
I know I will.

And when I do,
I'll be so torn up you won't even know who I am.


"Tear me up and look inside"