Day 17 | bigeyesseemore's Blog
I feel really drained. I don't want to move, haven't actually smiled in awhile, and I just overall feel terrible. I don't know if I'm sick or what, but the question is what is it that's made me like this? Is it just illness, or am I also sick of life? This one, or the next?
I still need a change, an actual one.
Honestly just considering messing things up, doing something awful, just so something, anything, will actually happen.
I'm beginning to dread everyday, it just feels like a chore, having to get up in the morning.
I'm so sick of everything and everyone.
I'm not eating as I should..Didn't eat yesterday, probably not going to today.
If I'm supposed to see someone, I'll just drink water to make it look like I'm normal.
Not just a bag of bones.
I don't know what I'm trying to do, I mean it's really not about loosing weight. No one to impress, don't really care anymore anyway. Eating just feels like everything else, an inconvience.
I went to the gym with Heather yesterday, didn't stay long. I hate her. She'll pick at you and tell you everything she doesn't like. She calls it encouragement, I call it hell.
Savannah's doing worse. She's going to die soon.
No one really knows about what's going on there.
I'll miss her, but she's just like everyone else really.
All the people close to me have a way of permanently leaving.
But yeah, there's the general update if anyone's listening,
Everything is just..
"Under my clothes are battle wounds for the war in my head. I hide them from you all."
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Previous PostsDay 3, posted May 22nd, 2013
Day 2, posted May 21st, 2013
Day 3, posted May 15th, 2013
Day 1, posted May 13th, 2013
Day 0, posted May 12th, 2013
Day 24, posted May 10th, 2013
Day 20, posted May 6th, 2013
Day 18, posted May 4th, 2013
Day 17, posted May 3rd, 2013
Day 16, posted May 2nd, 2013
Day 14, posted April 30th, 2013, 1 comment
Day 13, posted April 29th, 2013
Day 12, posted April 28th, 2013
Day 10, posted April 26th, 2013, 1 comment
Day 3, posted April 19th, 2013
Day 25, posted April 16th, 2013
Day 21, posted April 12th, 2013
Day 20, posted April 11th, 2013
Day 19, posted April 10th, 2013
Day 18, posted April 9th, 2013
Day 17, posted April 8th, 2013
Day 15, posted April 6th, 2013
Day 12, posted April 4th, 2013
Day 11, posted April 3rd, 2013
Day 11, posted April 2nd, 2013
Day 10, posted April 1st, 2013
Day 9, posted March 31st, 2013
Day 8, posted March 30th, 2013
Day 7, posted March 29th, 2013
Day 2, posted March 24th, 2013
Day 1, posted March 23rd, 2013
Day 0, posted March 22nd, 2013
Day 15, posted March 21st, 2013
Day 10, posted March 16th, 2013
Day 5, posted March 11th, 2013
Day 21, posted March 6th, 2013
Day 20, posted March 5th, 2013
Day 18, posted March 3rd, 2013
Day 13, posted February 26th, 2013
Day 8, posted February 21st, 2013
Day 7, posted February 20th, 2013
Day 6, posted February 19th, 2013
Day 4, posted February 17th, 2013
Day 3, posted February 16th, 2013
Day 2, posted February 15th, 2013
Day 1, posted February 14th, 2013
Day 36, posted February 11th, 2013
Day 34, posted February 9th, 2013
Day 33o, posted February 8th, 2013
Day 29, posted February 6th, 2013
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